or rather, it’s a fashion crisis that i’m dealing with.

problems i am facing include, but are not limited to:

• what does a 23, going on 24, year old female law student wear without looking boring?
  everything in the high street shops look as if they can only fit girls between 15 and 18, or are formal/office-type stuff.

  i have not the thighs of a 15 year old, nor the general gangliness that teenagers have, that make the clothes look so great on them, but so wrong on me. and all that exposure! ok, i’m not one to cover it all up, but there are limits, y’know. i have no desire to squeeze into skinny jeans and end up ripping them whilst picking something off the floor, or at A&E for numbness and/or paralysis by depriving my legs of bloodflow.

  similarly, i would like to avoid looking like miss prim, or miss legal. i’m not a lawyer yet, and i still have a good couple of years left before i actually need to hide my body from critical eyes. however, smart-casual is such a misnomer, and often oxymoronic - emphasis moronic.

  so, i do not want to dress younger, but neither do i want to dress like an auntie. big problem is, what the hell does the 23 year old female demographic wear?

• can i wear mustard yellow shoes without looking like a cock-a-nah-den?
  i love mustard yellow, but i’m afraid wearing yellow will set off the yellow undertones of my yellow skin, making me look sickly and sallow.

  although, really, it’s just my feet. my feet can look sallow,can’t they? it’s far away from my face, and hardly anyone will stare at my feet and go ‘wow she is the yellowest yellow person i’ve ever met’ right?

  a greater problem is the sudden boom in mustard yellow knit jumpers that seem to be in all the store windows. are my shoulders and neckline just slightly too close to my face for me to carry it off without looking consumptive? they look so great hanging off the rails, and on the mannequins, and i’m sure i can find one that fits so perfectly on me because i’m a champion (read: obsessive) shopper.

  but, seriously, is yellow on yellow okay?

• apparently the fashions for fall/winter is into layers, or oversize clothes, leggings, etc
  once again, looks that will only work on 15 year olds and/or very thin people, so i already know it’s not going to work on me.

  but i do love autumn and winter, and all the comfy woollens and knits and jumpers and coats. they cover up all the bad bits, and make you look so cuddly and fuzzy and huggable. magic, eh? and all the dark colours like brown and plum and maroon and black, they make fall/winter feel so romantic and mysterious.

  ankle boots, however, seem to be either very ugly, or highly impractical for walking in. they also look stupid with anything else but trousers, which detracts from the whole point of them being ankle boots and being able to show them off.

so these are a few of the questions for the seasons, which i may or may not find answers to, but they’re not life or death kinda problems so i might just very well let them slide. i mean, fashion is just fashion, right? and i’m too much of a feminist to actually admit that i give any time of the day to something so frivolous and so petty, even if i really do. although i could, perhaps, defend myself by attributing this to the post-feminist in me.

i often say that i’d be much happier when i start working, since i’ll need just 10 different shirts, a couple of suits (trouser suits and skirt suits), 3 pairs of court (or similar) shoes, and i’m done. no need to think about what to wear to the office, because it’s invariably going to be something like black&white.

anyway, sorry if all this clothes talk bores and/or appalls you. my boyfriend appreciates the end-result, but cannot fathom the actual deliberation/discussion that leads to that final choice, so i know where you’re coming from.

for now, the post-feminist/wannabe-hipster-fashionista in me has a ‘meet your firm’ day to think about, and a decision to make regarding which outfit will best make me seem like they made the right choice in giving me a training contract - i.e. intelligent, non-slutty, confident, non-girly, classic with a modern twist, etc.

très difficile et compliqué, non?